Someone once called me an escapist, and I promptly brushed the comment off as unfair and obviously untrue. But I now think it was probably true all along...I hide...its my defence mechanism...I pretend it doesnt exist...whatever it is that I cant deal with...but you cant live your entire life like that, can you? You cant keep 'escaping' all your life...

Lord, seems like this blog is going to turn into the dairy I never wrote...but what the hey...

Had an awful awful time yesterday...it was supposed to be a fun trip, but there was an accident on the motorway, and we ended up where we started after about 10 hours on the road...terrible...

But thats life for you...

The thing is, its almost certain very few people, if any, will ever read this blog..and the thought is kind of sad but comforting and liberating at the same time...

So anyway, the other day I was walking down my street. It was kind of damp and wet and as I turned the familiar corner to the building I live in, I was stuck by thought that I have done this before and I'll probably do this again, and I could do this till the end of time and it wouldn't matter. Nothing that I am likely to do in my life is going to change anything, and even if it did, what would it matter...

So does any thing in this world really matter? In the ultimate analysis, is anything worth it?

So blog world here I am..this is my first post...and already I dont know what to write...isn't that just classic, vintage me...never quite sure of the whys and the whats...anyway, how do I start this...

The weather of course...I have decided to be more positive about the weather...and unless you live in a grey, gloomy, rainy country, where moaning about the weather is somewhat of a national obsession you wont quite understand the point...

So its grey and gloomy and rainy outside, but I remember a time when rains were fun, when we would wait and pray for a wet, wet day...when rains meant happiness and days off at school and endless cups of hot chai and pakoras...so i refuse to let all this talk about 'this miserable weather' get me down...

later...